I Always Feel Like Somebody’s Watching Me

This article was originally posted on http://myfamilynexus.com

I’m sure you probably sang that topic but it’s so much more than lyrics to a song when you have children!

I’m sure you probably sang that topic but it’s so much more that lyrics to a song when you have children. A guest post by Colleen Rice

I remember when I was driving one day with my daughter and she was around four years old. We were behind the first person at the merge sign and the road was busy so they were not able to get out. I had just finished singing a song when I heard my sweet little girl say “Buddy, you better pick a lane because whichever one you go in, we’re going in the other one!”

I was shocked because even though that day I was happy and relaxed I was hearing her repeating something that I had muttered on rushed school drop off, late for a meeting morning. I hadn’t purposefully set out to teach her to be impatient,  but I had modeled it and in that moment. I was very ashamed.

What characteristics do you want your children to have? Do you want them to share,  be kind, forgiving, loving and peaceful?

You are the basis of all those things in your child’s developing personality.

Your role as Co-parent will present many challenges sometimes in modeling this to your little copycats. Although the ideal may be to never lose your cool under pressure those things happen.  Here are some special ways you can model kindness to your child’s other parent.  You will be their Hero for it;                                      

  • Say Yes Where Possible.  If it’s not something you will remember in five years it doesn’t really matter now.
  • Make sure your children are with their other parent on their birthday.  It’s important to them. Bonus points if you provide your child with a birthday gift for them:)
  • Make sure your children get to see their other parent on all important holidays;  Christmas, Easter, etc.   If it’s your time ask the other parent if they would like to split the day.
  • Make sure you inform the other parent of all concerts, special tournaments, activities for the children.
  • Put pictures of your child’s other parent in their bedroom.
  • Make efforts to say nice things about  the other parent to your child
  • When there’s a decision to be made about your child, ask the other parent’s opinion
  • Smile when you see the other parent and wave.  It will instantly ease your child’s tension.

MEET THE AUTHOR

Guest Post by Colleen Rice
A contributor to www.coParenter.com, Colleen Rice is a coParenting Consultant from Alberta, Canada. She keeps extremely busy with her full time position as a Supervisor for a Family Intervention Program and owner of her Divorce support company Family Nexus Inc. Colleen is a wife and mother to three children, two of whom she coParents with their father. Professionally and personally, Colleen has seen the devastating effects of conflicted divorces on children and has developed different supports to educate parents. To learn more about how to Healthily coParent you can join her Facebook support group: CoParenting Collective, on the website at www.myfamilynexus.com or follow on Twitter @thecoparenter.

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